Got it

I talked to the landlord, Rich, and he said I could have the apartment. I need one month security and pro rate whatever's left of the month I move in. I should be able to move in before Thanksgiving, he said. He said the tenants have to leave the 15th or 16th and then he'll go in and clean up. He said Pino and Ruffio are both welcome. Laura says there's enough room for my bike and the freezer and the dryer. I'm nervous but excited and I'll be right next to them so I won't feel alone.

Went to Roseann's and we watched Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey, Jr. Very good!! We had pizza and Anita's peanut butter pie. Yum!

Hope

Laura and Joel are such great people. They had me call their landlord, Rich about the apartment next to them that he's trying to get people out of. He called me back and said it's tiny and only has a shower. I don't care about that. It's $900/month with utilities included. THAT is great. Not sure about Pino yet, I have to check the stairs. And it will be right next to Laura and Joel and they will be family. I don't want to be isolated and alone.

Is life good?

I try to keep an upbeat attitude but this is getting ridiculous. Now I get a call from Rita that Pino threw up and we have to talk. What the fuck is there to talk about? Why didn't I just take Peggie's apartment? I should have known that this wouldn't be easy. I was supposed to be in the apartment a month ago. I'm not killing my dog so what other options are there? He's not feeling well. I wish he could do stairs because I could get the place above the Historical Society today and for only $500 and that includes all utilities.

Will there ever be a time when I'm able to live in peace?;
;Well things aren't goign to work out between the three of us so I have to oleave. WTF? I've been asked to leave even before I get into the apatment. And it's lies. It's alwayus lies.
'
My heart hurts so much. It's family and it's wrong I really do feel like I want to die

Stupid

Why do I left myself believe things are ok when they really aren't ever.First I get Rita bitching because THEY left the toilet seat up and Pino drank and then wet himself. And it's sooooo unsanitary, etc., etc., etc. While at the same time she has her dogs who use newspaper in the kitchen AND the male dog uses the legs of the table and the side of the recliner that's in the kitchen that reeks so badly of dog pee that you taste it in your food if you eat in the kitchen.

Then Sam tells me her and Jake and his mom are going to the Rhode Island Comic Con for the weekend. I wanted to go so badly and  she knew it and they don't ask me. Why do I let myself care so badly that I'm crying?

Next year the three of them can go to NY themselves and I'll go whatever day they're not going. I'm too stupid and let myself fall into the lie of believing that I matter when in reality I don't. It gets proven over and over and over again.

I'll figure out how to be happy doing things by myself. I was foolish enough to think that Sam might want to do some more stuff together, especially after this weekend.

Fuck it.

Later: When I got home she didn't say anything and obviously Pino hadn't puked anymore. I don't want to be down or depressed or negative. Got to try harder. Things will work out with her, with Sam, with everything. God does listen to my prayers.

Laura and Joel and Laura's mom, Monica and I went to Eric's service. What a nice service it was and his aunt and sister are so broken up but happy that he had so many friends. I'm so glad I went. He was cremated and his ashes are going to be secretly scattered in a place he absolutely loved.

Haunted Tours done

The past week has been very hectic with getting read for the tours. We spent Thursday and Friday night either rehearsing or getting ready - stuffing bags with candy for today and things. Both nights we spent hours in the opera house. I love that place.

The tour last night went well except for a few glitches. I think it was a good start for our edition of the cultural commission. Samantha wants to join us. She definitely loved the opera house and hanging with our crew. She'll be helping out with all our future stuff.

One of the tour groups that came through had Dr. Davis' granddaughter in it. I didn't realize he was a naturopathic doctor!! No wonder everything worked with him. She said the powders he gave us had belladonna in them. Amazing!

The kids' fright 'night' went really well. Sam definitely likes helping with our stuff. Diana brought the girls and Karla brought Kayla and pictures from when she used to hang out with Laura. Oh how young they were.

Eric died. The Concerned Fisherman and our cultural commission member. He was only 45 and I was just texting with him on Monday. What a shock that was. Joel wants the commission to have a plaque made and put on the bench on the Green that Eric always sat on. We've suffered a loss. Eric was a good guy.

Missed a day

Forgot to write last night but really, what's to write about?? I got to just sit home and that was that.

Tonight we did the walk through for the Haunted Derby Tour and ate pizza in the Opera House. I love that place. That's it.

Cancer sucks

Did I mention that Denise's breast cancer is back and she might get a double mastectomy? I hate cancer. Met Laura, Joel and Antonino down on the green for the breast cancer luminary thing. It was very moving. Tommy was there and had bought a luminary for Liz's daughter. She's something like 30 and pregnant and they found she has cancer. A huge mass in her colon. They're going to take the baby out in a week or two so they can operate and stuff on her. The baby is 7 months along so we'll pray that it's safe.

Met up with Brian Gallo there and bought his Valley Pink calendar with the CT Sirens and antique cars. It's for a good cause but I told him he needs a male version of the Sirens!

Got my Reclast infusion today. My blood pressure was 112/66 and I weighed myself when I got home and am 132 pounds. I think those numbers are good.

A new week

Received my autumn card from my October card swap. I have to remember to put it on Ravelry tomorrow night.
Nothing really going on.

Sox win!

And they're going to be in the World Series again. How odd. I just thought of this -- last time they won the Series was a long haul -- 20 years, I think. And I was living over here at the apartment. Now they're going to try again and I'll be living at the apartment again and watching it.

Cooked stuffed artichokes, stuffed mushrooms and deviled eggs. I was in a stuffy mood, I guess. Peggie called and invited me to go to Savers with her. I got four more tops so I may be all set now for winter clothes.

An alpaca and a dog

We went to Tea with Tracy's this morning. Seymour was doing some mini festival and one woman had an alpaca and a giant Great Pyronese dog. I fell in love with both of them!!!

We only did the play one time tonight. I really enjoyed doing this.

This will probably come up as Sunday, 10/20 but it's really what I did on Saturday. I'm editing this a little after midnight because I just got back from the Elks. Antonino texted me and asked why I don't come down. They were having their Halloween party and Timmy was there too. I knew Peggie was there so I figured why not. It's been awhile since I've been down for anything. So I sat a little with Peggie but mostly stayed and talked with Lina. I met Antonino's mother, who called me Rosalia. It's been so long since anyone called me that. I love it! She's very Italian but looks to young to have a 25 year old. Lillian, of course, was there too. I had a good evening.

The play's the thing. LOL!!

Well I agonized all day for nothing. I taped my lines to the front of my bible so I could get away with reading them. But just about everyone had the script and was reading from it. I still messed up -- talked all halting and unnatural , but I did it without losing my place or screwing up. One more show tomorrow night. Then next weekend is the Haunted Derby tour. Sam is going to do that with us too.

Then I got home and Anthony called. He got his white hat. That is some kind of promotion and it took James six months to get his. Anthony got it in three. I'm so proud of him!!

Thursday

Tomorrow is the lantern plan on the Riverwalk. Ugh! I do not have my lines memorized. I'm thinking of carrying a bible and having cheater cards inside. That should work.

This day

I slept great last night, thank God. Rufio was sleeping next to me most of the night and didn't decide it was time to play!

Went to rehearsal at no ... Don't know what I was going to say because this was from the other day and I forgot to publish it. LOL!!

Busy day

Work. Here to take out Pino and take care of Ruffio. Grocery store for olives -- ran into Roseann & Anita and talked a bit. Back here to make macaroni salad for pickie day. Back here to make the macaroni salad. Took Pino out again. Fried up a pan of shaved pork and ate two sandwiches. Now I'm sitting here relaxing. Yeah!

Stayed home

Was up half the night again between not being able to sleep and Ruffio not letting me sleep. So I called out at work and went back to bed.

Meeting tonight for the Haunted Derby tour. Duke is going to help us out which will be great.

On a roll

St. Anthony has been shoving stuff in my face today. Thing's I'd misplaced and asked to find, didn't find but didn't worry because I knew they were here in the room somewhere. Just accidentally found the boxes of checks and my spare bottle of vitamin D pills. Yeah! LOL!!

Spent time after work putting together the Halloween mini swap. That's all done and can be mailed off tomorrow. Tonight I'm relaxing for the first time in a long time and just watching tv.

They've been painting the apartment and fixing it up. I should be in around the beginning of the month providing I can pay Yankeegas the little I still owe them.

Another good day

Spent most of the day home knitting and watching tv. Might be going to see Janis Joplin on Broadway next month with Monica, Laura's mom. I'm dying to see it and she wants to go to. Have to check dates.

This day

I slept great last night, thank God. Rufio was sleeping next to me most of the night and didn't decide it was time to play!

Went to rehearsal at noon and it went pretty well. I'm going to have to see if I can memorize my parts. They gave me a shirt and pants to wear since I'm being Uncle Wooster and they have to find me a vest.

Then I went to the art studio to meet the others for supper. Laura cooked us ziti and we had garlic bread. Yum! Then we went shopping for costumes. I realized that Luisia tossed hundreds of dollars of my garb -- all my pirate stuff is gone too. So I got a pirate wench costume at Savers and we went to Goodwill and a couple of those Halloween stores.

It was a good day all in all.

Derby High School

Rufio kept me up most of the night. Around 3:30 a.m. I grabbed him and stuck him in the carrying crate so I could sleep. Then I had to get up at 6. UGH!!!!!!!!!!

After work I went to Peggie's for supper and then we went to the Derby-Ansonia game. Derby lost 28-62 but they played fantastic and it was a good fight.

Now I'm going to sleep. I hope.

New York, New York

Rode the train to NYC today with Sam, her friend Jake, and Jake's mom, Denise. What a great day I had. Comicon was fun but next year I go when there's actually people there. I bought a Dr. Who tshirt and some tea but other than that, nothing much. But I did have fun and it's a lot easier getting to and from the Javits Center than I thought. Too bad I have to work in the morning. Ugh!

Meeting night

Had a Cultural Committee meeting tonight. Also told Sam I'd meet her at the train station Thursday morning. They'll be coming in from Naugatuck.

Library

Worked as usual and then went to Stacy's food thing at the library. We learned to make different sauces -- bechemal, mornay, a wine sauce and an Asian mushroom sauce. Yum!! I love the cooking demos!

Loooong day

Went to Shelton Day with Sandy for an hour or so and then down to O'Sullivan's Island and the Riverwalk for four or five hours of rehearsal for Legends by Lantern. It was fun and it's so beautiful there and Jeri (Blackheart Jenny) and her husband, Ned are in it too so it was nice hanging with them. They're going to do the Haunted Derby tour with us too. That will be fun!

Good day

Ruffio is tolerating his cone and I don't know if it's the cone or the effects of the surgery, but he hasn't tried biting or scratching me yet. He's finally allowing my wounds to heal a little before he starts up again! LOL!!

I went to Adams and got three small pork loins, a pork shoulder and a rack of ribs and a butternut squash and a 12 pack of seltzer -- all for $49.09. Got to love good sales!

Then Sandy and I went to the Ansonia Harvest Festival and then Duchess. The day was a bit on the warm side -- a real Indian summer day but nice anyway.

I got the electricity turned on at the apartment this morning and still own $200 on the old gas bill but will try to get that turned on and maybe payment arrangements set up on Monday.

And now

Duke wants to give me a female role -- a bigger role. I can't even memorize the few lines he already gave me!!! I'll have to refuse. I'm afraid I'd really screw up.

I went to see Dr. Jagadeesh after work. It's so nice to be back with her. I'm 136 pounds -- not that good but it could be worse. Then I picked up Kayla and went to Naugatuck. Saw my Anthony -- he's really grumpy today and picked up Ruffio. Poor Ruffio -- I had to get a cone for him to wear so he won't bother his stitches.

Ruffio

Missing him already and it's only for one night. Geez! Sam and Karla came to get him and him and The Mayor go in for neutering in the morning. Then later Karla will bring him back and I'll pick up Kayla from therapy.

Last night Sarah, our usual waitress was back at the Milestone. It was wonderful to have her. I talked to her about Sam and she might be interested in having her babysit. She lives close to Sam. So I gave Sam her number today.

I started the chameleon that Carol wants me to crochet for Allena.

Went to Maureen Marren's wake. She was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer on Wednesday and died Saturday. I HATE cancer! Tomorrow night is Red Clynch's wake. Too many people dying!

Anthony is coming home tonight for two weeks again. I'll see him on the weekend, I hope.

Missed another day

I'm getting worse instead of better. Let's see -- we had a Cultural Commission meeting last night. City Hall is giving us all kinds of grief expecting us to personally take money out of our pockets to buy stuff and then get reimbursed. That's not going to happen!!

They did tell us we are in charge of the Opera House and should have the keys. It will be interesting to see how they get them from Rich.

It looks like the apartment is now empty but Rita hasn't said anything. I'm hoping she doesn't expect me to start paying rent (I am giving her $100/week board right now) until there's a refrigerator and hot water. I can use the extra month of not paying rent so I can pay off (I hope) the gas bill.

Tonight is Cosmic. I always look forward to that.